I'm neither for nor against apathy

Alright, so I spent the last week being sick with flu and fever, which I never tend to get, the fever, that is. I suppose I spent some time thinking of my life, what I should do and what I'm doing. Not all that certain of it as with fever I also spent most of my time staring at the shopping channel. So no clear thoughts, really.
Last week's friday I went out with co-workers, free alcohol etc. Was nice, relaxed. Not anything like I feared. Though then again I tend to worry alot anyway, for things that are not worth the worrying.
Today, I was to go to work, but slept through the alarm and I don't really feel guilty at all, though I probably should. Now at a friend's place, I dunno if I forced myself here or not, but just did not feel like spending another evening being a nerd.
I was supposed to have Daddy visiting me, but his wife was in town so it was a no-show. I can openly admit that I was disapointed, but, oh well, not like he can help it, really. Just would have wanted someone safe to curl up against. My co-worker said that I seem to have taken Pentti as a father figure. Well duh. From the first time we were in contact I told him that I need a father. So he knows it, I know it and his wife thinks he's cheating on her with me. Joy.
Over and out.